Can It, Buddy
Can It, Buddy
October, 2003
Our housekeeper, Chris, came in this afternoon and said that our trash tote (that big blue thing on wheels) disappeared from the curb. Today is trash day and it was out there when I came home about an hour ago. So, I call Big Blue Trash and Garbage to inquire. The customer service representative tells me that there was a note from their driver that the tote (her term) was broken, he picked it up, and there would be no charge. Naturally, I ask when a replacement tote would be here.
She tells me that there is a rental charge of $44 a year for totes. Since the tote had been in good shape this morning, I inquire how it was now broken. She tells me the driver probably broke it when it was on the lift on the truck. So, why would I get charged for something they did? And I had never been charged before and wondered why I would be charged now. I am politely informed that she does not know why I had not been charged all along. Had the tote come with the house? I respond that we’ve been here longer than they have been collecting trash out here and that I got the tote from their predecessor trash company (who also had not charged me for it). Well, if I want a tote, I would just have to pay for it. After sparing back and forth she asks: “Would you like to speak to a supervisor?” Bet your sweet bippy I would.
Supervisor comes on the line. I tell my story all over again. She wants to interrupt me a couple of times, but I tell her to let me get all of my side out and then she can tell me hers. We got into a Catch 22 conversation. This is the shortened version.
“These are old containers and they are due to break.”
“It was fine and you broke it. Why charge me for your error?”
“It would have broken anyway soon. “
“But it was fine and not broken and who knows how long it would have been if you had not broken it today.”
You know the stress of being outside in the cold.”
“It’s 75 degrees today and it sits in a heated garage all winter except on trash day.”
“We’re doing an inventory of the old totes from the previous company, so you would have been charged soon anyway.”
“So, sometime between now and never you might have charged me for a tote that you didn’t give me and that now you have broken.”
“Well, you could always buy some trash cans and use them until they break.”
“Not a good idea since our drive is very long. Can I buy the tote?”
“We don’t sell them, just rent them.”
“Guess you have me over a barrel. Well, please send a new one out.”
“That will be at least 30 days. They are back ordered.”
“So, you broke my tote, carted it away, and now won’t give me another one?
“We have people who ordered totes in August who still don’t have them.”
“What am I supposed to do with my trash and garbage for a month?”
“You could just take bags to the curb on trash day.”
“Does not seem like a good idea to have bags of garbage smelling up my garage for a week and then have to transport them in the trunk of my car down our very long driveway.”
“I’ll talk to the customer service manager and see if we can get you one in a week. Perhaps she would also agree to waive the rental charge.”
Wait a minute. Gotta get to a window to see if there are any pigs flying by.
October, 2003
Our housekeeper, Chris, came in this afternoon and said that our trash tote (that big blue thing on wheels) disappeared from the curb. Today is trash day and it was out there when I came home about an hour ago. So, I call Big Blue Trash and Garbage to inquire. The customer service representative tells me that there was a note from their driver that the tote (her term) was broken, he picked it up, and there would be no charge. Naturally, I ask when a replacement tote would be here.
She tells me that there is a rental charge of $44 a year for totes. Since the tote had been in good shape this morning, I inquire how it was now broken. She tells me the driver probably broke it when it was on the lift on the truck. So, why would I get charged for something they did? And I had never been charged before and wondered why I would be charged now. I am politely informed that she does not know why I had not been charged all along. Had the tote come with the house? I respond that we’ve been here longer than they have been collecting trash out here and that I got the tote from their predecessor trash company (who also had not charged me for it). Well, if I want a tote, I would just have to pay for it. After sparing back and forth she asks: “Would you like to speak to a supervisor?” Bet your sweet bippy I would.
Supervisor comes on the line. I tell my story all over again. She wants to interrupt me a couple of times, but I tell her to let me get all of my side out and then she can tell me hers. We got into a Catch 22 conversation. This is the shortened version.
“These are old containers and they are due to break.”
“It was fine and you broke it. Why charge me for your error?”
“It would have broken anyway soon. “
“But it was fine and not broken and who knows how long it would have been if you had not broken it today.”
You know the stress of being outside in the cold.”
“It’s 75 degrees today and it sits in a heated garage all winter except on trash day.”
“We’re doing an inventory of the old totes from the previous company, so you would have been charged soon anyway.”
“So, sometime between now and never you might have charged me for a tote that you didn’t give me and that now you have broken.”
“Well, you could always buy some trash cans and use them until they break.”
“Not a good idea since our drive is very long. Can I buy the tote?”
“We don’t sell them, just rent them.”
“Guess you have me over a barrel. Well, please send a new one out.”
“That will be at least 30 days. They are back ordered.”
“So, you broke my tote, carted it away, and now won’t give me another one?
“We have people who ordered totes in August who still don’t have them.”
“What am I supposed to do with my trash and garbage for a month?”
“You could just take bags to the curb on trash day.”
“Does not seem like a good idea to have bags of garbage smelling up my garage for a week and then have to transport them in the trunk of my car down our very long driveway.”
“I’ll talk to the customer service manager and see if we can get you one in a week. Perhaps she would also agree to waive the rental charge.”
Wait a minute. Gotta get to a window to see if there are any pigs flying by.
posted by Bud Hirsch at 9:38 PM
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